Welcome to Connections

Your weekly pānui for tips, tricks, and strategies to deepen your connection with your tween, teen, or adolescent.

Kia ora Reader

This month we’ve been getting into detail on the art of reflective listening.

We’ve tried out a three different sentence starters all useable for changing the way we communicate with our rangatahi on the daily.

The recurring piece that follows every single one of these opening lines is the pause.

It's powerful!

When we pause, we’re waiting for two things:

Their reply
Their nod.

The nod from them and eye contact (if possible) let you know you’re in rapport together and they’re ready to talk.

This is important because:

We’ve been in the parenting habit of expecting our younger children to answer when we talk to them. With pauses we’re inviting them to talk with us.
Pauses show we’re trying to understand what life is like for our rangatahi.
Our pause acknowledges them and therefore our rangatahi feel heard and understood.
Pausing creates space to be genuinely curious and non-judgemental.
Empathy puts us on the same side as our rangatahi.

I encourage you to dig in and explore the power of pausing when you communicate with your young person.

Keep it open, be engaged and your connection will deepen.

Kia pai tō wiki ... have a great week

Melanie

Melanie Medland is a communication coach, an author, and a course creator.

More at www.beautifulconversations.co.nz

Click here for your complimentary strategy call.

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